Up and down and up and down

Sorry for not posting for a while - I guess life has a habit of demanding attention sometimes! Actually had a bit of an up and down week - sometimes feel OK, sometimes sad. Trying to stay busy and thinking positively helps, sure it does, but then sometimes you just feel rubbish and want to cry and feel sorry for yourself.

I still sometimes wonder if i have done the right thing. More in a - I can't imagine not being around him, nor can imagine being with anybody else - type way. Its obviously pretty normal behaviour to wonder if you have done the right thing I suppose. I just don't want to spend the rest of my life with crappy blokes always thinking 'why was I so bloody stupid not to see what a good thing was'! But similarly, I guess if I stayed with him and always just accepted that I had made my decision - in time I believe I would have got resentful - and I think I would always have wondered 'what if?' You know? I guess you always have a choice - so you will always wonder what the other road would have been like. As they say, 'C'est la vie!'

So what news? Well - as much as I had actively tried to avoid the cliche's about breaking up - I ended up going to the hairdressers today and getting the chop. Not as bold as I had thought about being - but actually it was quite refreshing. Now it feels shorter and swishy and I do recommend - if only so that you physically look 'moved on' - which I guess is how it got so popular. I also decided to go the whole hog and went 'one shade braver' on hair colour too - although that is still sat in the box waiting to be unleashed. Gotta keep hold of the hairdressers blow dry for as long as possible - you know how it is!

Also toyed with going to MAC and getting a whole new look - but lets face it - changing all external appearances doesn't make you stop hurting internally - so I will just stick with the hair for now. Plans for next week? Well - I figure it helps to stay positive :) going to throw myself into my work, eating well (i.e. healthily and regularly) - getting my gym induction, washing my car and making plans for the future.....and you should too!!

Laters